I Am Filled...

I Am Filled....

I am filled with Joy

I am filled with Peace

I am filled with Courage

I am filled with Hope

I am filled with Truth

I am filled with Patience 

I am filled with Forgiveness 

I am filled with Understanding 

I am filled with Grace 

I am filled with Love

"There but for the grace of God, go I..."

- John Bradford

Lose the Attitude...

Attitude is defined as a "settled way of thinking or feeling.  When we enter into any relationship, we tend to bring an attitude with us.  We have already concluded on what is acceptable and what is not.  This could be based upon past experiences, analyzing the relationships of others, or just preconceived notions that we've developed along the way.  

What can happen is that once into that relationship you quickly learn that the other person doesn't operate exactly like you and if you're not careful, the attitude that you brought with you begins to show very visibly.  It could manifest by the tone in your voice, your moods, your body language and even the look on your face.  Before long, dissension develops and if not handled quickly and appropriately there could be an insurrection. 

“Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too. You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.”

‭‭Philippians‬ ‭2:3-5‬ ‭NLT‬‬

When handling the life and love of another, always seek to understand before being understood.  Don't listen with the intent to respond, but listen to understand.  Lose the attitude because it could be detrimental to what you're trying to establish.  We can't always have it our way. 

“And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.”

‭‭Colossians‬ ‭3:17‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Marriage - A Reflection Of God's Love

A year and a half into marriage and today it hit me like a ton of bricks.   Marriage is teaching me to love like God!   You might already know this and somewhere deep down I knew it too, but it truly came alive in me today.   

We have so many imperfections, yet there is someone who loves us incessantly.  Throughout our shortcomings, our defects and malfunctions He never stops loving us.  He literally died so that we could have life.  

When I relate this to marriage I am reminded that I too must die -DAILY!  I must die to my selfish ways; realizing it's not just my life anymore, but the two became one.  I must learn to be quiet at times and simply pray.  I must learn to be led and not always seek to lead.  Not always my will, but sometimes his.  

Marriage is a unified front where two join as an alliance for a greater good. Marriage is faith, hope, trust, unity, peace, love, patience.  

May your marriage today be a true reflection of God's love.  

Praying Together...

Prayer is direct communication with God, so when you and your spouse talk to God together, it's truly powerful. You will create a deeper bond with each other and it also enhances your level of communication.  You both will be on the same page, discussing your goals and objectives with God, as well as praying together for those in need.  

Never stop praying. (‭1 Thessalonians‬ ‭5‬:‭17‬ NLT)

Make it your goal yo begin praying daily with your spouse. 

Communication is Key...

I know you've heard it over and over and over again, but let me repeat it - communication is key in marriage.  Before my husband and I exchanged vows, we downloaded some pre-marital questions in order to spur conversation and we learned tremendously more about each other.  We both understood and understand how important it is to say how you feel and to not allow negative feelings linger.  You say it in the moment, tactfully, to keep offense from setting in.  One thing that we learned in pre-marital counseling is that offense is an enemy of marriage.  If I don't tell you that what you said hurt my feelings, then how are you supposed to know?  We assume that people think how we think, so they should know that they hurt us, but this is simply not the case.  We are adults and should be able to communicate as such.  

Practice over communicating with your spouse.  Talk about work, talk about your in-laws, talk about the weather, talk about your hobbies - just find things to talk about.  Talk about difficult, touchy subjects too.  Leave nothing off the table.  The more comfortable you'll begin to grow with always talking to each other.  

Something that my husband and I do is read together.  From there we will discuss what we read and gather each other's viewpoint.  This tends to lead into other conversations and it helps you develop a sense of your spouse's thought processes.  

Communicate, communicate, communicate.  

Selflessness...

I think many times people are frustrated in marriage because they go into it for the wrong reasons.  You can't be selfish and have a successful marriage.  Marriage is a ministry.  "Ministry" is from the Greek word diakoneo, meaning "to serve."  You are to serve your spouse and they in turn serve you.  Your goal is to aide them in the fulfillment of their life's purpose and they are to do the same for you. If I am overly concerned with serving my spouse, helping them and making them happy and they are doing the same in return - when do I have time to be selfish?

Forget 50/50!  That's not realistic.  Yes - there will be some days when one person gives more than the other, but so goes life.  If I love that person as much as I say I do, then I'm not keeping score.  

Many people go into marriage for the two income household or because of sex, but those are just a byproduct of marriage - not the main purpose of it.  

Marriage = selflessness!

Doesn't Have to Be Hard...

Almost five months into marriage and I've realized that it doesn't have to be as hard as I've heard some people make it out to be.  Does it take work? Yes!  Hard - only if you make it.  

Just like I need a job to keep my bills paid and a roof over my head, I need my marriage.  As I pondered writing this, I used the analogy of a career and the things that we endure to remain gainfully employed.  We put our best foot forward and give it 110%.  Some of us went to college for years and continue to takes classes to remain relevant in our chosen field. We don't wake up in the morning and say, "I'm going to do a crappy job at work today!"  When given instructions we follow through and if we don't know the answer, we seek it out.  Well it's just about the same with a marriage.  

You must take the time to study each other, just like you would to learn the material for a test.  Remember how many times you said, "I've paid too much for this degree to waste time!"  Well your marriage is worth more than that degree or that career.  I think sometimes we prioritize incorrectly and lose sight on what's more important.   I read something the other day that said, "Being a mother is not about what you gave up to have a child, but what you've gained from having one."  You haven't lost your identity by being married, you've gained a greater sense of oneness and connectedness with another person.  There is no other feeling in the world like it.  And just like we fight to prove ourselves to earn promotions, we should fight even harder to strengthen and develop our relationships with our spouse. 

Pray together daily
Talk about everything; nothing is off limits
Hold hands often
Read substantive material together and spur meaningful conversation
Talk about your goals and push each other to accomplish them
Discuss your finances regularly
Stick to the plan
Don't put yourself in compromising situations
Always be honest

What therefore God has united (joined together), let not man separate or divide. 
(‭Mark‬ ‭10‬:‭9‬ AMP)