Almost five months into marriage and I've realized that it doesn't have to be as hard as I've heard some people make it out to be. Does it take work? Yes! Hard - only if you make it.
Just like I need a job to keep my bills paid and a roof over my head, I need my marriage. As I pondered writing this, I used the analogy of a career and the things that we endure to remain gainfully employed. We put our best foot forward and give it 110%. Some of us went to college for years and continue to takes classes to remain relevant in our chosen field. We don't wake up in the morning and say, "I'm going to do a crappy job at work today!" When given instructions we follow through and if we don't know the answer, we seek it out. Well it's just about the same with a marriage.
You must take the time to study each other, just like you would to learn the material for a test. Remember how many times you said, "I've paid too much for this degree to waste time!" Well your marriage is worth more than that degree or that career. I think sometimes we prioritize incorrectly and lose sight on what's more important. I read something the other day that said, "Being a mother is not about what you gave up to have a child, but what you've gained from having one." You haven't lost your identity by being married, you've gained a greater sense of oneness and connectedness with another person. There is no other feeling in the world like it. And just like we fight to prove ourselves to earn promotions, we should fight even harder to strengthen and develop our relationships with our spouse.
Pray together daily
Talk about everything; nothing is off limits
Hold hands often
Read substantive material together and spur meaningful conversation
Talk about your goals and push each other to accomplish them
Discuss your finances regularly
Stick to the plan
Don't put yourself in compromising situations
Always be honest
What therefore God has united (joined together), let not man separate or divide.
(Mark 10:9 AMP)
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